Well, I checked the standings and the Vancouver Canucks are in the oh-so-prestigious #11 spot for the NHL's Western Conference. Now, for the uninitiated, the NHL's 30 teams are divided evenly into Western and Eastern conferences, and the Canucks' conference standings of #11 means there are only 4 western teams doing worse than them at the moment. Let's take a look at those teams:
#12. Calgary Flames
Ahh, Calgary. Believe it or not, these guys won the Stanley Cup back in '89, even after trading away Brett Hull for some guy nobody's heard of. Also notable for having the NHL's first mascot with Harvey the Hound (whose tongue was famously ripped out by the Edmonton Oilers' coach Craig MacTavish in one of the best NHL mascot stories ever), having the single ugliest alternate logo in sports history and apparently having some sort of controversy regarding whether or not they should've won the cup again in 2004. How a team with such an illustrious history has managed to fall even below the abysmal Canucks is beyond me, but somehow they've pulled it off.
#13. St. Louis Blues
Despite almost always having fantastic players (the aforementioned Brett Hull is a notable example, and as many know Wayne Gretzky was with the Blues for a season), the St. Louis Blues have never really managed to be that much of a presence in the NHL. When they're not completely sucking (as they have been the last few seasons), they're stuck firmly in the middle tier - not bad by any means, but not going to win anything important either. That, and while admittedly none of the new NHL jerseys look that great, the Blues' new sweaters are especially bland. Kind of suits their current performance, don't you think?
#14. Phoenix Coyotes
You know, I've got a bone to pick with the Coyotes. I was never much of a Winnipeg Jets fan, but when they moved to Arizona and became the Phoenix Coyotes, I was pretty pumped. You want to know why? Because, god dammit, that coyote logo of theirs was awesome. But what did those bastards do? Oh yeah, they got rid of the only thing their team had going for them. They had the coolest jerseys in the entirety of the NHL, so when it comes time for a redesign they scrap everything that made their old ones awesome and replace it with a jersey so boring and uninspired, it might as well be the generic starter shirt for your created team in a hockey game. Except said hockey game would probably let you add more details to the jersey, whereas the Coyotes are left with something dead boring and they can't do anything about it. Which usually wouldn't matter, but since their jerseys were previously the only good thing about the team, it's a pretty fatal blow.
#15. Edmonton Oilers
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA...
Sorry, I hate hockey teams from Alberta and seeing the Oilers ranking at the bottom of the conference fills me with joy. Suckers.
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3 comments:
What is it with teams changing logos? Especially the Canucks. Quit it!
just thought I'd let you know, the "Winnipeg Jets" would be from Manitoba, not Alberta, so I guess now you can't hate em.
Winnipeg is in Alberta. Right. I should've remembered that.
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